Tuesday 29 March 2011

The week that was...


I haven't posted in a week or so. Instead I've been using my free time to wallow in Nigella books! Can't seem to put them down. Must be some kind of nesting, domestic goddessing instinct or something. Anyway, here's what you've missed...
  • Baking highlights: Nigella's 'Individual Apple Pies' from Feast- I turned it into a whole apple pie, added a pear & cooking apple, spiced it as she said and it tasted of a childhood you never quite had but nostalgically imagine existed. Having said that, my mum is a bit of a pudding queen so my childhood wasn't far off! Best pastry I've ever made, but I'm not sure if that was because it was the first time I'd used a processor to make it, or because it used cream cheese (in either case, I can't take the credit). Interestingly the pre-fridged dough was wetter than how I would make it by hand, and when I make it it falls apart. Lesson there?
  • Baking lowlights: The lovely husband has put a stop to the baking as we've been having too many sweet treats, apparently. Can a 39-weeks pregnant woman eat too many cakes? Unfortunately my Nigella 'Domestic Goddess' reading is stirring a strong baking itch and I think only a long-keeping, ground-almondy loaf cake is going to fix it.
  • Spring: You should've seen it outside this week. Warmth that persuades you to remove not only coat but cardi too, like the parable predicts. Daffodils in lines as far as you can see. Birds singing like they'd had too much caffeine, laughing at the weather and dispatching their cares. Sitting in the play park for an hour longer than we intended, twice, chatting to friends, eating oranges and watching the Little One come out of himself (just like those daffodils). Invading the neighbour's garden in the evenings so the children could play together and clearly prefer that to coming in for dinner. Woozy bees, woken a little early and looking to burrow in amongst the grass. Sunshine and blue skies that could be summer, were it not for the leafless branches framing the view above. I have been in heaven.
  • The nest: My lovely husband cleaned and vacuumed after the first week of the loft conversion! A lovely break for me, and a timely one as the number of Braxton Hicks I was having suggested any exertion would encourage an early baby. And the loft conversion (now two-weeks in and half-way or more) is going well- considerate, hard-working builders; glorious views from the veluxes; glitches fixed; mess/dust/noise not as bad as anticipated. Meanwhile I have been nesting with Nigella and trying to channel my easy-going mother who would let a loft-conversion, even in the last days of pregnancy (am I mad?!) slide over her like water on a duck's back.
  • Sewing: None! I have had a little break, and my lovely husband has been photographing my recent crafting (more on that another time). But I shouldn't have had a break: the Big One told me his school bag was breaking and I needed to sew the straps back. I put it off. They have now broken and are beyond repair. Trip to the shops in the last week of pregnancy, joy.
  • Cooking highlights: Jamie's ragu from 'Italy'- consistently yummy, several hours of putt-putting away with no effort from me, easy to make, and the double part of the quantity is now perched in the freezer awaiting post-baby-no.3 iron-rich comfort feeding. Nigella's 'Slow-cooked Lamb with Beans' from Feast- oh my, that meat fell off the bones and melted in our mouths, even the Little One could manage it, and the rest of us went back for more & more. It's in the Easter section. Go make!
  • Cooking lowlights: Nigella's 'Sweetcorn Fritters', made as a treat for the boys and I, and nothing special. And I forgot to soak the beans for the bean & barley soup I was going to make. Something of a habit - should I be setting phone reminders for bean soaking do you think?
  • Odds & ends: Lovely chats on the phone with friends and family. No visitors this weekend for a change (hooray!). Bought a caterpillar tunnel for the Toddler Group May Queen walking float (we are the Hungry Caterpillar!). And Nigella's 'Kitchen' arrived in the post. Which was the start of all this nesting and domesticating this week, the seed for my Nigella book-binge diet, and the reason for not posting here at all.

Thursday 17 March 2011

Habitude

Habitude... isn't that a lovely word? Perhaps I should have called my blog by that name (along with about forty other options I had!). It means a habit or tendency, but I think invokes the words habitat and habitable too. I like that for me it expresses two meanings that so much define my life. To inhabit: to be in the home, the place where my heart and my family (often one and the same thing) live. And habit: to repeat patterns in life, the beautifully mundane, the little moments of custom and routine. Some people have wanderlust, where they need to keep moving to see the world. I need to stand still as the world wanders about me; for my home to frame the seasons, to see the murmered growing up of my family. Some people like to collect different snapshots of an ever-growing collection of places. I like the movie you see when you stay in one place and let each page of life flick over like an old animated flip book.

PS The picture was what remained of some roses a dear friend gave me. They almost looked lovelier like this than when gathered on a flowerhead. I watched them fade and brown but still smell delicious, and the process reminded me of the anti-wanderlust I feel.

Tuesday 15 March 2011

Sewing project no.2!

I thought I'd show you sewing project no.2... chuffed to bits with it, though of course I can also see what I could've done better. It is a bag I made chiefly from Clarke & Clarke fabric for the birthday of one of my best, loveliest, kindest, beautifulist (sic) friends. So it needed to at least try and be as lovely as she.

Nice? I am so pleased with it. Didn't have a pattern but I seemed to manage okay. Postives & negatives?
  • Everything lined up!
  • Really liked my idea to embellish the bag with the two strips of ribbon and the contrasting buttons. It makes it a bit more individual.
  • I managed neat stitches in parallel lines.
  • I also managed neatly hand-sewn buttons.
  • This friend is a bit of a champion baker and lover of old-fashioned tea crockery, so the fabric was a good find.
  • Turning the handles out - oh my goodness, how laborious and difficult. I read somewhere about making handles and that there is a special tool for doing it. I think I need that tool!
  • Tension problems again, but the satisfaction of fixing them.
  • Didn't quite manage to get it done in time - it arrived a day late. But the pressure of a deadline can detract from the enjoyment of sewing so I had to balance the two.
Thanks to my clever husband by the way, for the photos.



Wednesday 9 March 2011

Starting the week with some making, baking, sewing & happiness

Beautiful spring sunshine and a Monday morning getting the chores done (the joy of vacuuming) left me feeling optimistic and eager to get on with some projects!

I made some cards on Monday evening, only one of which I can show you as the others have yet to make it to their destinations. A good friend of mine had a little girl, so I made her a little collage card. I'm really enjoying the collage technique for my cards. As a teenager I was pretty good at drawing but I've discovered it's not like riding a bike - having held the knowledge of my talent so smugly within, I tried a decade later to draw again only to find I can't. Cue depressed self-loathing. And so I think I need a bit of collaging before I venture into the frightening world of the pencil again.

Then came the glorious spring sunshine on Tuesday morning, to which my little garden crocus in its regal purple - and no longer solitary - responded with thanks. As did I! It's like it's petals were clenched shut against the chill of winter's last breath, and then opened with a little 'aaah' of relief. It's also been joined by a lot more garden growth and the hellebore lower down in the garden has sprung back to life. We've only been here for six months so I feel a little guilty calling these plants 'mine', but since I've inherited them I think they could do with a little loving and stewardship. I have a weekend of gardening coming up (complete novice) with my wonderful mum (not at all a novice). More to follow!
On Tuesday afternoon, the Little One slept for an unexpected and glorious two hours! Out came the sewing machine, the fabric for a couple of children's presents, the mug of green tea and a very satisfied me! It's been lovely to feel that the sewing is coming more easily now, and that although I'm still not following patterns, I'm feeling more competent at working out what to do and how. These fabric pieces frayed after pre-wasing. They will become bags, but worried about wear-and-tear, I've made each bag side its own turned-rightway-round sealed unit (there must be some technical language for this that I should be using - feel like all I can manage is gobbledegook) so that when I sew them together there's no way they'll fray apart with use. Don't you just love the Hungry Caterpillar pattern?! I adore Eric Carle's illustrations.

And when the Big One came home from school on Monday, we hurriedly made rhubarb muffins from an internet recipe to use up some slightly wizened rhubarb. Good texture, but too much vanilla and too little sugar. I think they'll taste better with a bit of thick yoghurt for breakfast. I did make a yummy Nigella Moroccan chicken stew on Tuesday night though, with double quantities so that there was a meal to freeze for post baby-number-three.
Oh, and pancakes! Followed Ruth's tips on the Pink Whisk, but probably should have done something fancy and exciting to post to the blog. The problem is, I'm such a sucker for lemon & sugar. And we've had quite a few Scotch pancake recipes recently. Maybe next year!

Monday 7 March 2011

The weekend was...



... rather lovely, all in all, but also...
  • Grey and drizzly on Saturday, but beautifully so.
  • Bright, spring sunshine on Sunday with the birds sounding very excited and the jackdaws eating the bread the Little One and I had left out.
  • Wrapping a best friend's present (sewing project number 2! - more to come on this later) and feeling excited in the hope she likes it, nervous in the worry she won't, and a little sad to be letting it go.
  • Delicious sausage meat & tomato pasta on Saturday night with the boys, inspired by Jamie.
  • Card making Saturday night - four in two hours... perhaps I need to up my card-making rate?!
  • A little lonely, minus a husband (who had gone out for a very rare weekend with chums).
  • Too many satsumas eaten (they came with leaves from Abel & Cole - couldn't resist a pretty picture but they look a little odd under the glare of the flash); but then I don't think there's such a thing as too many. Besides, I go a little crazy for seasonal food and am revelling in the last glut of sweet, sharp, bright citrus before we move on a season.
  • A midwife visit - all fine - but bringing the scary realisation that with four weeks to go til the big day, it's becoming a bit of a runaway train and there's only one way out!...
  • so I must start thinking about cooking some stews and such to last us through the early weeks...
  • and sorting out the baby clothes for the last time...
  • and getting on with the sewing and card making as I don't think I'll be up to much of it in April!
  • A lovely night out with the mummy friends on Sunday, but I ate half a pudding too much, which is a fatal error at 36 weeks pregnant.
  • And I discovered that the Little One is garden-obsessed, galloping with delicious laughter up and down the decking, picking berries to squeeze down the gaps, feeding the birds, jumping, and insisting he wasn't cold because he was worried it would mean he would have to come in. Such a contrast to my homebody Big One who would gladly spend hours snuggled in a bed-den in his room reading, rather than go outside. I need to take up some crafting hobbies that I can do on a chair in the garden I think.

Saturday 5 March 2011

My first sewing project - bunting

The first present that came up in this year of making was for our friend's little girl, who was turning two. I needed a sweet, lovely gift for a sweet, lovely girl. What was a novice seamstress to do? Bunting didn't seem too difficult to do but could be personalised and made with a little love (!) so I headed off to John Lewis for the essentials and off I went, minus a pattern, and eventually came up with this:

It's three pieces of pink gingham with three pieces of floral cotton, hemmed, sewed onto a length of binding, and then four felt letters sewn on. I felt quite impressed with myself! But more than that, what I really gained was the enjoyment, excitement and challenges of the sewing project itself. I found out that I could definitely like this sewing thing.

The highlights and lowlights of the experience were:
  • I made it without a pattern, but still managed to do alright. I thought, being a little perfectionist, that I would be the sort of sewer that followed patterns. But it turns out I quite liked the freedom of finding my own way and seeing where the cloth took me.
  • I had a nightmare with the tension. Firstly, I didn't know what tension was! Once vaugely understood, I realised I had it wrong but myriad attempts to correct it with a more proficient sewing chum only seemed to make matters worse. I tried to hold face in front of her but I really felt like crying with exasperation by the end - not like me! It showed me how much emotion I had invested in this sewing expedition. What was great though was that I managed - on a cooler, calmer day - to rectify the problem by myself and go on to finish the job.
  • I also managed to figure out the tension differences required for the flimsy gingham and the thicker fabric.
  • I had planned to hand stitch the letters on with a more homely-looking blanket stitch (although I've not blanket stitched since I was about seven). Time worked against me though, so out came the sewing machine again. I quite like the results (you can see it on the 'i' below).
  • I had a really lovely response from the little girl's parents. Firstly they thought the bunting was bought, which made me feel a little less amateur, and then they were so appreciative of the effort involved. It was such a lovely feeling, so much better than giving a well-sourced bought present.
  • And there was so much I got out of the process myself - yes there had been moments of intense frustration, and times when I felt overwhelmed, but overcoming the challenges and feeling I was making something so lovely felt so good. I think I could get a little addicted to this.

Thursday 3 March 2011

The project so far - cards

Here's what I've been getting up to, just before I started to write about it all...


Making my own cards. Not doing much more than cutting out pictures from magazines at the moment, but I hope to do a little more when I've got a little more time!


 While fun, it's a little bit of a sacrifice too as I love card shopping; spending ages searching out the right card for the person.

I'm also making my own presents, but more on that another day. My first project was sewing bunting and I think it deserves a post of its own, for both good and bad reasons!





 The home-made presents and cards seem an ideal way to be more creative. They give me the a chance to show the recipients how much they matter to me (it takes an awful lot longer to sew a present than to shop for and buy one!). And they give me practice in the skills that I'm currently a novice at. Of course they save a bit of money too, which is no bad thing when you're a one-income family with a third child on the way.
  

These cards appear in the order I made them. I think I like the Happy Anniversary one the most.

This post was a little diversion from present making (a bag - watch this space!). Now back to it...

A little movie

Since I was much younger I've had a little movie in my mind of my perfect future. It looks like this: I am in the kitchen, a large kitchen, with a big farmhouse table. There are children drawing at the table and a baby in a highchair. I have an apron on and I am smiling. As you walk past the oven, it smells of baking, of pie for dinner. If you walk to the open kitchen doors, the evening sunlight from the garden is warm and like honey as it softens the room. Around the door, honeysuckle or mock orange is growing, heady-scented in the evening warmth. There are china jugs on the table with haphazard garden flowers. My apron has flour dust on it. There is a lot of smiling. And my husband comes home, kisses the children, the baby and me. And I am feeling, 'here I am', living in what I once dreamt of, emotionally satiated and complete.

I used to think I was wrong for dreaming of this. That I was betraying feminism, or I had left my intellectual potential unfulfilled. Now I don't think that at all. Now I think, if that dream showed me who I was and what I wanted, then what is more feminist than to give myself the opportunities to make it real? And why can't I have an enquiring, challenged mind within that life? Here I am trying to live it and to write about it too, and my mind is flying higher and more free than it has in years.

Tuesday 1 March 2011

Spring & the beginning

Today is the first of March, the first month in the trio of spring months and it seems as apt a day as any to take the plunge and start writing something.

At the weekend the very first spring colour appeared in our garden. Yesterday my husband took a picture for me and today, in chilly but promising sunshine the crocus has opened to say hello. Thus so shall I!


I have been searching for the things that make me happy and fulfilled, for the life I want to live, and for a way to make it a vocation (hopefully). This Christmas gone I finally felt I had found my answers:
  • My family: loving them, nurturing them, learning from them, being with them.
  • Domesticity: cooking, baking, sewing, making, and all the things that make this house feel like a home and these days feel like a life. Being a homemaker is not a default, a leftover or a bottom rung. It is the way you wrap your family in your arms every day, and let them fly away when they need to.
  • Nature: the birds, animals, flora and fauna, and all the weather and seasons that frame them. The first daffodil of spring brings enough joy to almost knock me over. I hope I never get cynical or jaded enough to stop noticing it.
So I have set myself the challenge of living the life I dream of this year, and I hope for the years to come. I made a list! (I am one of life's list makers; can't decide if that's embarrassing or something to be proud of!)

This is the year that I will:
-        learn to sew and buy a sewing machine
-        keep cooking and bake more
-        make a quilt bedspread for the little one's bed
-        spend more time outside in nature, and bring it inside with me
-        make all my cards myself
-        ditto for presents, as much as possible
-        learn to decorate fairy cakes
-        embrace the domestic life, for nothing else fulfils me more
-        nurture my two - maybe three (one month to go til baby #3 lands) - lovely boys
-        try not to drown in the early weeks of new motherhood, but accept I probably will!
-        try to have a bit of a babymoon
-        live with the seasons, and revel in the year's celebrations of them
-        find more time for my boys
-        ... and more time for me
-        write, write, write
-        finally read a book again!
-        make cushions for the house
-        always have a vase of flowers or foliage in the house, ideally found not bought
-        appreciate the simple joys in life
-        and with all this, be happy.